Ask Kayy

Meet Kayy, our new relationship columnist. With the help of professionals and her own romantic savvy, she’ll attempt to answer your most burning dating, love and sex questions.

Dear fellow TCNJ students,

I’m not a doctor (yet). I’m not a therapist. But I’m a college student, and I know relationships. Not to mention hooking-up, drunken booty calls, robbing the cradle, long-term monogamy, online dating and one night stands.

You name it, and I’ve laughed as my friends did it and have cried when I made the mistake of doing it myself.

Mysterious rashes, acquaintance rape, flavored condom malfunctions, interracial dating, coming out to conservative parents, roommates unexpectedly walking in on “private time,” cheaters cheating and manipulators being so damn good-looking . the list goes on.

I won’t lie. Just because students at the College are “smart” doesn’t mean they’re smart about relationships (never mind remembering to wrap their tool).

Sometimes I think college is a sick joke – admissions takes the most dedicated and studious kids, throws them in co-ed dorms where alcohol is flowing and long-suppressed hormones are raging, and then they sit back and watch the chaos that ensues (while expecting us to maintain a high GPA and healthy lifestyle).

They probably have a grand old time tallying the cases of floorcest, games of spin the bottle, frat party hookups, early-morning transports, awkward orgies, coyote uglies, walks of shame, etc. Wouldn’t you laugh?

Well, in keeping with my tradition of trying to stick it to the administration, I’ve graciously volunteered to guide you poor, lost, lonely, confused or frustrated geniuses along the path to relationship savvy . or at least tell you where to find a vibrator that outlasts your boyfriend, and to dump that asshole who’s cheated on you with various blondes in various areas of the New Library (been there, done that, expect the book next May).

So I’m making a deal with you, readers. You send me wacky, kinky, sexy, serious, paranoid or terrifying questions to keep me entertained, and I’ll do my best to answer them with candor and a bit of humor.

My one guarantee is that you’re not as weird as you think you are, and that your problems aren’t too unique to be solved.

And I may not know everything (hard to believe, I know), but I know plenty of health specialists and counselors in the rare case my hard-earned experience and dog-eared, highlighted copy of “Relationships for Dummies” just won’t cut it.

So bring it on . The Signal and the College could always use some more romance.